Thursday, January 31, 2013

The Circle Turns Again

The circle of life--we all know it.  There's a death, and there's new life.  It's a balancing of things.  On a farm, the circle is something you get to see a lot.  There can be a lot of death, and there can be a lot of new life.  I lost my Ginger on Saturday.  Today, the circle turned, and I gained some new lives.

Ok, I didn't personally gain those lives. They belong to Daphne:

Or Daphne-False-Alarm, as I'd come to call her.  Daphne's been insisting she's pregnant since early November.  I'd put a nest box in, she'd make it beautiful for a week, then she'd destroy it.  No babies. She didn't want Philip Johnny near her, she'd grunt and complain.  Twice I'd done this, and twice she would make the nest, act all grunty, and then destroy the nest.  No babies.  I finally put her with Philip Johnny Bob after Christmas and watched the mating this time.  She grunted at him and denied him the whole time.  I actually had to hold her still for it.  Apparently, she does not find PJB attractive.

"I do NOT find him attractive!"

Weeks passed and nothing.  No nesting, no nothing, just same old Daphne.  I figured it didn't take, and wondered what I would do, since she can't breed Buckley (her brother), and she didn't seem attracted to PJB.  Maybe the convent life was for her?  But then I brought her in yesterday to do her rooing.  She's skinny.  But her belly was big.  And kinda floppy.  So I put my hands on her to feel, and there was a-kickin' and a-turnin' going on in there like I'd never felt since Ellie had her babies.  Yeay!

HOW does she not find this attractive???

When she was done being rooed, I brought her out, put a box together with the matty hair I can't save for spinning, and left her be.  She dug in the box, ripped it up pretty well, and made a mess of things.  But lo and behold, this morning, she made 6 beautiful babies.  Three are black, and 3 are not.  They are wonderful and squirmy and hot.  And mama is doing just fine. 

"Because I am all that and a bag of CHIPS, baby!"

The circle has turned again for us at Chicken Scratch, and this is the part I like the most. 

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Monday, January 28, 2013

Love is Hard

On Saturday morning, I found my Ginger dead.

She'd been acting strange (er) for the last few days, and I knew something was up.  But being a goose, she wasn't talking. 

I miss my girl.  She survived a horrible dog attack years ago, but never was quite the same afterwards.  She hatched out two duck babies to keep her company last year, and I'm proud to say that they always slept with her, because she would badger them until they did.  She was a funny one.

I will miss her complaining honk.

I will miss her insistent push into the garage for food, even though she wasn't allowed to do so.

I will miss her hiding her head in my shirt.

I will miss her scolding.

I will miss seeing her yell at the pool.

I will miss the way she would be hell-bent to set on eggs wherever she wanted, even if that place wasn't the safest.

She was unique, and a little light has gone out of the world with her passing.

Rest in peace, pretty girl.

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Thursday, January 24, 2013

The Shoe is on the Other Hoof

Did you ever sit with goats when they are chewing their cud?

Their eyes half close,

Their pupils become fixed,

Their ears droop (if they have ears),

And the only thing moving is their mouth.

Munch, munch, munch.

Then there's the swallow, which is fluid, but then the wait for the next mouthful.

The disturbance of the burp,

And the chewing begins again.

Munch, munch, munch.

I swear they go somewhere else when they chew cud. 

It's like they transcend. 

They go to "Goaty Happy Land", or wherever they go.

Wherever it is, it's not here, and not much phases them when they're chewing.

Usually they just fall asleep after, so I think it's a kind of meditation.  Whatever it is, I hate disturbing the sanctity of the cud-chew, and I love being around the goats when they're doing it.  They relax, and it makes me relax.  What a blessing.

I've been sick for the last 3 days, and I'm getting tired of it.  I filled in for a woman at work all last week who had the flu.  Despite disinfecting everything on her desk, I got sick, but not as badly.  My nose is stuffed, my head hurts, and I cannot get warm, despite layer upon layer of clothing.  However, I feel lucky that I can at least stand up, and I have a little energy to get my chores done.  It's been VERY cold here, and my chores have been very long every day, with changing out waters a million times a day, and feeding, and of course, watching Stewart and "his" girls.

The shoe is on the other hoof, let me tell you.  The first two days, they beat him mercilessly.  Then they had it out on Monday, and a little bit on Tuesday, and everyone is singing a very different tune today.  Now he's the one they are trying to avoid.  Turns out he likes the way they smell.  Turns out they'd rather he didn't jump on top of them all the time.  Go figure.  He's tried to blubber at them.  He's tried to pee on himself (just a little, and just on the back of his legs) for them.  He's snorted at them and butted them into "position".  They are having none of it. 

I'm hoping that means, in Minerva and Dulci's case, that they're already pregnant.  I know Dulci played hard to get when I took her to be bred, so no promises there, but Minerva was ready and willing when she went to be bred earlier this month, so I'm hoping that's a good thing.  She wants no part of Stewart at all right now, and this would be the time. 

What's up with Lilly?  I have no idea.  Her heats were obvious during the summer, and less so in the late fall.  It's possible her cycle is over-I have no clue.

Sweetly enough, Dulci seems to have a crush on Stewart. She does not want to mate with him, but she does sit near him and butts him like she's flirting. It's cute to watch, like a little girl picking on a little boy because she doesn't know how to tell him she likes him.

Anyway, the dynamics have changed quite a bit.  I no longer bring Stewart into his own pen in the garage for his safety, but rather so the girls can sleep without being mounted.  Go figure.  They worked that out quick!

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Monday, January 21, 2013



....At least, that's what we think his name is.

Did you ever have an animal who defied being named?

Or seemed to have a lot of names, none of them exactly it?

That'd be Stewart here.

We've seemed to settle on Stewart, it seems to be right for him.  Of course, many other names have seemed sort of right for him at different times, so anything could happen.  We've played with Nathan, Cai, Pod, Prince, and Ned.  Names that seem to fit him, then don't.

Anyway, I am VERY happy with Stewart.  He is a sweet and gentle soul, and not even a little smelly.  Of course, he's only 7 months old, so that helps.  I'm pretty sure his previous owners gave him a bath or something, because he actually smells really good.  He has beautiful bone structure, and he's as tall as Minerva and Lilly, who are a year old in two weeks.  He is skinny, though.  I'd put his BCS at a 1.5 or a low 2, so he needs to be fed and fed.  Although, who am I to talk?  Min and Lil I'd only put at a 2.5, and I'm not thrilled with that.  They all need to be fed.  Dulci, however, is kind of a fat sausage and a solid 3, by my book, so that's good.  I admit I hadn't expected that it would be tough to keep them in condition over the winter.  Now I know, I'll combat it a little better.

Yesterday's introductions did not go well.  He wanted to see the girls and maa'd like mad when he saw them, but they were not so thrilled.  After much sniffing and snuffing, they proceeded to beat the hell out of him.  He just ran.  That was really the problem.  Well, that and Minerva's one horn.  That was not so helpful, either.

Today we started differently.  After they would not allow him to sleep with them in their house last night, my husband and I knocked together a pallet-pen in the garage for him.  He is used to living alone, so he didn't seem to mind.  He went right in, and settled right down.  Watching the different breeds react to different situations has been really interesting.  When Min and Lil came home, it was like pulling teeth to trick them into going into their pens.  They STILL have to be coerced to go inside.  That may just be Alpines, though.  Dulci never had a problem going into her pen, and neither does Stewart.  He went in, and went to sleep.  This morning, I took him out after he'd had breakfast (and the girls had breakfast), and we did the dance again.

My little fat pink Dulci sausage!

I put their coats on, because it was really chilly this morning.  I was also hoping to kind of throw them off, and have them all disadvantaged by the weirdness.

That sock thing was my attempt to cover Min's horn.  It lasted maybe 20 minutes.  Maybe.
 As you can see, we've moved up in the world.  I have made GoatCoat 2.0, which is WAY more glamorous than 1.0.  They coordinate, which is super sexy.  I got one on Stewart, but it's not his.  It's actually Winter's but since she's not here and he is, he's borrowing it.

Lilly refused to wear her coat. 

The morning started off pretty well and the coats seemed to work.  The girls followed Stewart around and sniffed him and bumped him a little, but nothing major.

I stayed way out of the way.  My touching anyone makes everyone jealous, and then the fights get nasty.  I kept a big distance and just watched.  It lasted about an hour, then Stewart's coat fell off, and Minerva seemed to accept him.  That made Lilly mad. 

If Minerva is the queen (which she is), then Lilly is her Lieutenant.  They go together like butter and toast.  Lilly, I think, got jealous.  Then there was a lot of this:

 And this:

But happily, there was also a lot of this:

He fought back, which was great.  Yesterday he was just taking it, and I was worried.  Today he dished it out just as well.  So I let them go.

And Minerva watched,
And Minerva participated.  And you know who didn't?

 Dulcinea SausageLink.  Who stood right in front of me and didn't get in the way.  Smart girl.

Lilly and Stewart fought until her head got a red spot on it from the bumping.  The noise they made when they banged heads together was really something.  Then they got tired and decided to quit, so I got a treat, poured a bit in all their bowls, and shut the gate to their pen.  I watched them from time to time the rest of the day, and there was no fighting.

Stewart is sleeping in his bachelor pen tonight again, and he's exhausted.  The girls ran him off this evening after dinner, which seems to be the pattern.  They did go all day without another conflict, though, so that's progress.  He's happy in his pen, and he's wearing his borrowed coat, because tonight it's supposed to be in the single digits.  I also got everyone else's coats on them as well--even Lilly's, though it took two of us to do it.  I draw the line at letting them go without when it's that cold.  Yes, they all look glamorous.

We are working it out.  I take comfort in the fact that after this is ironed out, I'll have to do it again.

And then again. 

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Wednesday, January 16, 2013

Let it Snow, Let it Snow

It snowed again, and there's no school today for the kids, which means by 12 or so, they'll be bored, and I'll be looking for things for them to do.


It's ok, though.  I've been working, and as much as I need to do so, I am glad for the day to catch up a little.  
Minerva, snow goat.

On Sunday, I'm going to go check out a buckling to see if he'll fit with my girls.  This guy:

Isn't he handsome?  I am very excited about him.  As you can tell by the ears, he's a Nubian, and he comes from good lines.  I think he will add a lot of good to our homestead, so I'm hoping he'll be a good fit.  I have ordered him his own collar and harness, in anticipation.  Not that I'm looking forward to meeting him or anything.

Not that I like goats, or anything.

Nah, not me.

I remain very impartial.

I will definitely let you know. 

Minerva A La Mode

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Saturday, January 12, 2013

Life is Good, Let's Make Some Plans

I've been really busy at work lately, and had zero time to post.  But yesterday, I ran some errands, saw my farming friend, and then I went to pick up a replacement Silkie roo for the little white silkie boy who died earlier in the month--I took two home.  The white boy and a partridge Silkie, which I've only seen rarely.  My friend and I are going to breed the Silkie roo to her Frizzle hen and make Sizzles.  I have no idea what that's going to look like, but man, I am excited to see.

So yes, I am feeling very positive and excited today.  I love talking shop with people who do the same thing I do and care about animals as much as I do.  I feel energized.  And I finally have a little time, time enough to write down my list of things to work on this coming year.  So, because it's raining out, and pretty foggy, I choose to look to the future and see where I'm headed.

Wanna come with?  Let's go!

The Homestead Stuff

1.  Crops, crops, crops.  Last year, I planned to take more of the lawn for food production  (You can see last year's plans here, if you want).    I did this.  I took the plot and turned it into field corn, but that did not go well.  I will probably re-use this plot for some sort of green manure this year, to see if I can improve it.  I did make the plot for flowers and gourds, and those went fine.  I added some blueberry bushes, but unfortunately, lost a couple of apple trees to the wrath of Minerva the One-and-a-Half-Horned Terror and her "jump of doom".  All in all, though, it was not enough. 

So, new plan.  I am going into the "front yard".  I will tell you, this goes against all my instincts.  I was brought up in a neighborhood and always lived in neighborhoods (and still kind of do), where everyone has a "front yard", which is pretty and that's it.  Well, no more.  I am gardening the front, and a good patch of it, too.  And I'm tucking in edibles wherever I can in the flower garden.  Food prices are rising.  Our little money doesn't go as far as it once did.  We need to produce, and in bigger quantities.  So front yard, it's your turn!  I'm looking forward to this, I hope you'll all come and see how it goes (heck, I'd like to see how it goes!).

Miss Sara, sweet as she is, decided she liked to pee on things in the house.  So now she lives outside.  And she can pee wherever she wants.  I think it makes Thor sad, though.

2.  Berries.  I have ordered a bunch of raspberry starts to add to my patch here.  I'm going to sucker off the blackberries.  The blueberries I mulched with pine needles to get them to start up.  It's all been surrounded by a fence, so I get the berries before the birds do (ha ha).  I am hoping this year will be a boon, or on it's way to being a boon. 
Violet, who went to live with my brother in Albany.  I understand she enjoys sitting on the couch and watching TV.  Funny enough, her brother Alexander, who is my daughter's new "room pet", also likes to watch TV on the couch.  However, he likes the Disney Channel.

3.  Woodlot Management.  My husband, admittedly, is in charge of this.  I don't chop wood, plain and simple--I have enough to do.  He did a good job, too, getting rid of the old wood pile and turning it into usable wood.  But he started late in the year, and though we have a good amount of wood, it's not enough to get us through.  So, he's vowed to do a better job this year and start much earlier.  He's going to take better advantage of the trees that have fallen in various storms, and he's going to walk the property and judge which trees he should take and which he shouldn't.  I am hopeful that possibly we'll not only have enough this next winter, but maybe enough for that winter and a bit of the next.  Wouldn't that be something?

4.  Compost.  More compost piles!  Nicer compost piles!  I think that says it all.

My son got parakeets for Christmas, which are fascinating to those of us of the pointy eared and furred persuasion.

5.  Vegetable Garden.  Management-wise, this past year was 1000% better than the year before.  It was really rocking.  I want to keep the momentum going and get it even better, if I can.  I would also like to get into that herb bed, because I ignored it AGAIN this past year.  It's got a lot of potential, I just need to find it.

6.  Front Flower Garden.  Will.  Be.  Fenced.  No more rose-eating geese allowed.  'Nuff said.  I also plan to plant more, hopefully more from seed.

Synchronized Sleeping--Just one of the many talents of the domesticated goose.

7.  Chickens.  We are having a bit of a chicken crisis here at Chicken Scratch, what with all these chickens, and no eggs.  I have no idea what's going on, and it's really annoying me.  So this year I will be adding a few more chickens, all winter layers and hybrids.  I hate to do it.  I really like the old varieties of birds, like the Rocks and the Wellies, but they are not cutting it right now.  In will be coming birds like the Leghorns and the Red Stars.  Oy.

8.  Glamour Chickens.  The plan last year was, use the cutey-pie red coop (which I made redder) for the little glamour birds like the Sultan and the Silkies.  Didn't happen.  Because that coop was right next to the main coop, everyone just went into one spot, and no one used the little red coop at all.  But HA!  I am smarter than a chicken (kinda) and figured it out.  The little red coopette has been moved to the side yard and was used for the turkeys.  I'm going to wheel it to the front yard, use the leftover wire I have, build a little yard, and keep the glamour chickens in there.  The little Silkies will be the first guests of that house.  Take that you tricky fowl!!
Tell me you're not in awe of Buckley's awesome crimp, and I'll know you lie.  He is TOO cool.

9.  Goats.  This was a huge one last year, and I'm glad we did it.  This year, we will add a buck.  Between the cost of breeding Minerva, and the cost of what it would have been to breed Dulci (my friend was very kind and did not charge me), I would have paid for a buck already.  That's ridiculous, so I'm going to keep one for myself, because, frankly, I'm going to need to breed them each year or so to keep us in milk.  We will keep one of the bucklings from one of the girls as a wether for companionship and to train to a wagon.  So far, the girls have learned commands on the leash, and I started them late.  I think if I have a nice wether, I could train him to a cart no problem.  Goats are smarties!

Percy DOES fit into this basket, yes he does.  You just think he doesn't.

10.  Fiber Animals.  Currently, there are three English Angoras, one Satin Angora, a Jersey Woolie, and two Jersey Woolie/English Angora crosses living here.  They are beautifully colored, but of course, like any crazy person, I'm wondering what other colors I can come up with.  Daphne will be bred to PJB, and Buckley will be bred to Camille.  Out of all of that, we'll sell some of the kits, and keep some that are really nice to add to our colors.  Then I will start selling the fiber, as I've already looked up where to do that.  I would also like to continue to work on my spinning, maybe finding/buying a wheel at some time.  And I'm thinking an Angora wether may find his way on to the homestead at some point, but we'll see.  I think he'd be a nice companion to the girls and help keep the peace a little.

I've been sewing, as it's been cold and there's a bit of snow on the ground.  I'm trying to knock out projects that have been sitting.  This one is ok.  Not really me, but it's cute.

11.  Maple Syrup and Honey.  The trees are marked again, more this time.  The splines were bought, and milk gallons are being saved.  We're ready for part 2 of this adventure.  We'll see how it goes.  I am hoping for  a better result than last year, but every system needs time to work out the kinks.  As for the honeybees, well, they all disappeared 2 years ago, and I took a year off.  This is the year back on.  I will start with 2 hives, change where they go, and see what happens.  Hopefully the aliens abduct someone else's bees this time.
Little snowman on the fabric of the runner.  They are cute.

12. Meat Birds.  We really did that up this last year, didn't we?  Oy.  Again, I will be doing the meat birds, but I may do them in a smaller batch and just for certain people.  Feed has become very expensive, and those guys can eat!  This is still a thought in my head, though.  I still have to think my plan through.
I made these too, new oven mitts.  These are more "me".  I really like them. 

13.  Milking.  I should be milking this year, and I am excited about it, and scared at the same time.  What a commitment!  Not that farm animals are not a commitment anyway, but a milking schedule is going to change things but good.  Boldly I go into the future, though.  For better or worse.  I am hoping for better.

The Home Improvement Stuff

1.  Sewing Room/Office.  Never painted it.  It's still a mess.  I really need to get on it. 

2.  Pantry.  Still needs sheetrock.  Bad, bad, bad!

3.  Back Deck.  Needs some love and some stain. 

4.  Outside Wood Beds.  Need some repair and replacement and then paint.

5.  Kid's Bathroom.  Eventually, I will get to this.  I just know it.

6.  Kitchen.  Will be finished when the backsplash arrives.  After that, it's all gravy.
After the Christmas decorations were put away, I went through my quilt cabinet.  This is the pile.  That's not even all of them.  Apparently, I have a lot of quilts.

The Personal Stuff

1.  Quilts and Sewing.  I have a lot of quilts.  I have a lot of unfinished quilts, too, and that's a waste of material.  The winter is so short, so I am making an effort to get as many done as I can.  We'll see how this goes, and then I'll have to figure out other places to stash all the dang things. 

2.  The Fiddle.  I didn't.  Not at all.  I would like to, but I'll be honest, I may not get to it again.  I'll have to see how it goes.

3.  Business Tracking.  I need a better system for receipts and tracking expenses for Chicken Scratch.  I also would like to find a system to keep track of what is produced and it's value, so I have an idea of what the farm produces for us as a family.  I know I bring in income by doing what I do--it's trackable in sales.  But what about the stuff we eat or use that I make or grow?  I would love to put a value on my work, just to see my contribution.  This is a big project for the year, and I'm not quite sure how to do it yet.

Oh holy heck, that's a lot.  But I like to make lists, because it shows me where I'm going.  And there's nothing I like better than seeing where I should go or what I need to do.

I think it's going to be quite a year.  Let's all see together, ok?
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Friday, January 4, 2013

Goat Sex and Other Adventures

I know.  What a hell of a post title to start the year off with.

It wasn't my plan.  I was going to write all about goals for the year and nice stuff, but you know farming.  Plans are nice and fun, but often need to be changed, and at the last minute.  Since I want to be honest in this space, I can't write about plans and such when there are other things going on. 

So you're going to hear about the other things first.

Back before I knew about the CAE results for my goatie girls, my plan was this:  breed Minerva and Lilly, my Alpine girls, and wait on Dulcinea until the following fall (2013).  Dulci is petite in size for whatever reason, and she is not my first choice.  I truly think that she would benefit from an additional year's growth before breeding, to catch up some.

Then the CAE results came back, and Dulci --born in someone's backyard to questionable parents--was the only clean one in the bunch. 

My little petite banana girl would get to be the first to be bred due to her clean status, and then after she'd kidded --whenever that was-- I would breed Minerva and catch her kids and so on and so on.  By then Dulci's babies would be too big to nurse (and hopefully gone), so the chance of them becoming ill from Min's milk would be minimal to none.  So, Dulci went off to meet her lover last month, and after a lot of trouble and a pulled back, she was presumably bred.

Fast forward to this week-which is her heat week.  If she went back into heat this week, then the breeding didn't take, and Dulci would need to make the visit again.  What happened this Tuesday?  Yep, she went back into heat.  At first, I thought it was a minor thing, some tail flagging, a little swelling.  You know, just hormones.  But this morning, she was mounting Minerva.  So yep, that's a heat alright.

Great, so off she needs to go to visit the boy again.  But wait!  Yesterday she slid on the ice and today her front hock is swollen.  Yeay!  I brought her in, splinted her and wrapped her (didn't feel anything broken), and out she goes.  But she can't stand on three legs for breeding, can she?  And she wasn't exactly willing the first time, so this time might not be any better.  And my back is still sorta out, so I can't hold her up.  We're all going to get hurt!  I'm going to miss this one, yes I am.

It's life, and it's not the end of the world.  But the truth of it all is that as much as I love my girls (and I do, I really do), they need to hold up their end of the bargain and produce.  They are not the most expensive animals to feed (that dubious honor goes to my many non-laying chickens right now), but they're not free.  And waiting it out means more months go by without a goat in milk.  Or the potential to be milked.  This is why a fourth goat will be joining us next month.  Her name is Winter, and I mentioned her here.  Winter heads to the breeding pen tomorrow on my friend's farm, to be kept and bred for a few weeks (to make sure she goes into heat) and then I'll be bringing her home.  The plan was that then I would have Dulci and Winter in milk and that's two goats, and they are both clean, which is what I wanted for this year, so I was a happy, happy camper. 

But Dulci's breeding didn't take, or seemingly did not, so I am potentially down to one milking goat again.  That's a lot of goats to feed for only one in milk.  That's not good, from a cost/benefit standpoint.  From a heart standpoint, it's just fine, mind you.  I love them and I love them.  But the realism of life is that they all need to be paid for, and I have to justify the cost (to myself, really no one else is asking).  So ugh.

I'm so pretty!

However, life is funny.  And when Dulci came back from her love tryst, she smelled like stinky boy, and threw Minerva into a wild heat that same day.  You know what that means, right?  That means if Dulci was in heat three weeks ago and threw Minerva into heat at that time, then Minerva is in heat now, three weeks later.  There is a light at the end of the tunnel!

Dulci says "No thank you"
I don't get paid the big bucks for nothing.  After some quick thinking and changing of plans, I called my friend and asked who she thought I could go to to get Minerva bred.  There is a dairy farm up the road from me (up the road being a general term--it's actually a little further up the mountain in reality), and my friend is friends with the owner.  After getting phone numbers, I made the call.

After dropping names and talking goat, I got the ok to bring Min to meet Prince.  He's a stinky Nubian buck who's not too much bigger than Min.  They met in the driveway.  Minerva hardly looked at him.  She was so in heat, she just stood still as a stone.  He snuffled her, blubbered a tiny bit in her ear (I imagine that he was saying "Stand still woman, I'll be done in a second", or something equally romantic), and 12 seconds later, it was over.  And yes, I'm sure he did what he needed to do.  It was -um-obvious.

No drama.  No me holding up the front half while the back half collapses.  She didn't run away.  He didn't read her love poetry.  Wham, bam, thank you ma'am.  Done and done.  There is nothing pretty about goat sex.  Nothing at all.

I count Min as being bred.  She should kid in early June, as long as the planets are in alignment.  What will her babies be?  Albians?  Nupines?  Should be interesting.

My plan will now be for Winter and Min to be in milk, and I'll catch Min's kids and probably tape her teats so there's no accidental nursing from anyone's babies.  It means bottle babies--again--and man, that was a LOT of work, but it is what it is.  If Dulci is having a false heat and is actually bred, then the more the merrier.  If not, which is what I suspect, then I will have the two, and I will breed Dulci in the fall to get three in milk.  In the meantime, I am seriously considering adding a buck.  I was going to add a wether from one of my girls (whichever girl gave me the nicest boy) to help keep the peace, but I am seriously thinking about adding an un-neutered buck as well.  It will be far easier for me to put the girl in heat in with the boy instead of all this clandestine driveway loving they've had so far.  I think I would feel more confident in that method as well.  We have some fencing and an area that could easily be used, so it's definitely a consideration for us.

Plans, plans. I'll keep working on it.  I'll keep you posted.  And I promise that my next post will have nothing to do with goat sex.

Well, let's hope not, anway.

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